9 Comments From Olympic Commentators

Here are the top nine comments made by sports commentators during the 2004 Summer Olympics that they would like to take back:
1. Weightlifting commentator: "This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning during her warm up and it was amazing."
2. Dressage commentator: "This is really a lovely horse and I speak from personal experience since I once mounted her mother."
3. Paul Hamm, Gymnast: "I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father."
4. Boxing Analyst: "Sure there have been injuries, and even some deaths in boxing, but none of them really that serious."
5. Softball announcer: "If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again."
6. Basketball analyst: "He dribbles a lot and the opposition doesn't like it. In fact you can see it all over their faces."
7. At the rowing medal ceremony: "Ah, isn't that nice, the wife of the IOC president is hugging the cox of the British crew."
8. Soccer commentator: "Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field."
9. Tennis commentator: "One of the reasons Andy is playing so well is that, before the final round, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them... Oh my God, what have I just said?"

Out The Window!

There was an American on a business trip in England. He got on a train, and was unable to find a seat. The man walked up and down the different cars until he discovered that an old lady's tiny dog was taking up a whole seat. He said to the lady, "Hey, you think you could move your dog? I can't find a seat." Now this wasn't a nice lady, so she replied, "You rude American! My little poodle needs somewhere to be!" So the man walked up and down the cars again, looking for somewhere to sit. He came back to the lady and the dog. "Look lady, I need somewhere to sit. Can you please put your dog on your lap?" Of course, the woman's reply was about the same as the first one, "You again?! Go away you rude man, don't bother my poodle!" So for the last time the man searched for a seat as the train started. He came back to the woman angrily, "Move your mutt lady!" The woman went into a fit of frustration, scolding the man like a child. Finally he'd had enough and grabbed the dog and threw it out the window. The woman sat in disbelief until the man across the isle said, "You damn Americans, you do everything wrong! You drive on the wrong side of the road, you eat with the fork in the wrong hand, and now you throw the wrong bitch out the window!"

Red Is UG's Color

Q: Why is "red" the color of the University of Georgia?
A: Because they can't spell "crimson" or "scarlet".