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The best jokes and joke writers!

Pickled Bread

Q: What's another name for pickled bread?
A: Dill dough.

Vaseline

My girlfriend used Vaseline on a hand job today.

I came three times in the shower trying to wash it off.

Palm Sunday

It was Palm Sunday, and the family's 6-year old son had to stay home from church because of strep throat. When the rest of the family returned home carrying palm branches, the little boy asked what they were for. His mother explained, "People held them over Jesus' head as he walked by." "Wouldn't you know it," the boy fumed. "The one Sunday I don't go to church, and Jesus shows up!"

Geek Date

Q: Why do Geeks have complex relationships?

A: Because they're real, but their girlfriend is imaginary.

Vampire Fruit

Q: What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A: A neck-tarine!

Three Redneck Lies

  1. The pickup is paid for.
  2. I won this belt buckle in the rodeo.
  3. I was just helping that sheep over the fence.