Just been to see an art exhibition on depression. The pictures had hung themselves.
Q: Why should you only put 239 beans in bean soup?
A: Cuz one more will make it "too farty!"
Q: Why did the dog sit in the shade?
A: Because he didn't want to be a hot dog!
Life Insurance Thoughts
My wife and I took out life insurance on each other, so now it's just a waiting game!
Q: How many men does it take to put down a toilet seat?
A: Who knows - it's never been done.