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The best jokes and joke writers!

Craig's List - Robot

A man buys a lie detector robot that slaps people who lie. He decides to test it at dinner. He asks his son, "Son, where were you today during school hours?" "At school." The robot slaps the son. "Okay, I went to the movies!" The father asks, "Which one?" "Harry Potter." The robot slaps the son again. "Okay, I was watching porn!" The father replies, "What? When I was your age I didn't even know what porn was!" The robot slaps the father. The mom chimes in, "Haha! After all, he is your son!" The robot slaps the mother.

The robot is back on Craig's list.

Terrorist iPhone

Q: How do you blow up a terrorist iPhone?

A: Put it into airplane mode.

Robot Sex

Q: What do you call a robot whose sole purpose is to have one-night stands?

A: Nuts and bolts

Han and Leia

Q: What did Luke say to Han and Leia when they split up?

A: May divorce be with you.

Mexicans in Star Trek

Q: Why are there no Mexicans in Star Trek?

A: They don't work in the future, either.