Relationship Jokes - Marriage Jokes

Concerned Husband

A concerned husband went to a doctor to talk about his wife. He says to the doctor, "Doctor, I think my wife is deaf because she never hears me the first time and always asks me to repeat things." "Well," the doctor replied, "go home and tonight stand about 15 feet from her and say something to her. If she doesn't reply move about 5 feet closer and say it again. Keep doing this so that we'll get an idea about the severity of her deafness". Sure enough, the husband goes home and does exactly as instructed. He starts off about 15 feet from his wife in the kitchen as she is chopping some vegetables and says, "Honey, what's for dinner?" He hears no response. He moves about 5 feet closer and asks again. No reply. He moves 5 feet closer. Still no reply. He gets fed up and moves right behind her, about an inch away, and asks again, "Honey, what's for dinner?" She replies, "For the fourth time, vegetable stew!"

Categories: Relationship Jokes (Marriage Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Man Criticizes Woman) , Old Age Jokes (Hearing Jokes) , Disability Jokes (Deaf Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Regulations

Hospital regulations require a wheelchair for patients being discharged. However, while working as a student nurse, I found one elderly gentleman already dressed and sitting on the bed with a suitcase at his feet, who insisted he didn't need my help to leave the hospital. After a chat about rules being rules, he reluctantly let me wheel him to the elevator.
On the way down I asked him if his wife was meeting him."‘I don't know," he said. "She’s still upstairs in the bathroom changing out of her hospital gown."

Categories: Profession Jokes (Nurse Jokes) , Old Age Jokes (Wheelchair Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Marriage Jokes)
Anonymous

Psychic Contact -Riddles

A woman goes to a psychic and contacts her recently dead husband. “Are you happy?” asks the woman. “Yes,” says the husband. “I’m in a field surrounded by beautiful cows.” “Can you see any angels?” asks the woman. “No, but there’s a prize-winning cow standing in front of me. A real stunner.” “Have you seen God?” asks the woman. “No,” replies the husband. “But the cows are really, really fantastic.” “Why do you keep going on about cows?” shouts the woman. “Sorry,” says the husband, “I forgot to mention – I’m in Wisconsin. I’ve come back as a bull.”

Categories: Dark Humor Jokes (Death Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Marriage Jokes)
Anonymous