Dark Humor Jokes - Death Jokes

Reliable Source

A psychiatrist met a friend and exclaimed, "I heard you died." "But you see I'm alive," smiled the friend. "Impossible," said the psychiatrist. "The man who told me is much more reliable than you."

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Throw Yourself Into Work

When Joe's wife ran away with his car, his money and his best friend, he got so depressed that his doctor sent him to see a psychiatrist. Joe told the psychiatrist his troubles and said, "Life isn't worth living. I think I'm gonna top myself." "Don't be stupid, Joe," said the psychiatrist. "My wife ran off and left me too, yet I'm happy." "How?" asked Joe. "Easy," replied the quack. "I threw myself into my work. I totally submerged myself in my job and soon forgot her. By the way, Joe, what work do you do?" "I clean out septic tanks." Joe replied.

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Jumping the Gun

I went to a crematorium to plan my wife's funeral, but apparently she has to be dead first.

Copyright © 2015 - Kiel Phillips - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Written By: KielPhillips