Vodka

Q: Know why vodka is so clear?
A: Its so Russians can tell it isn't tap water.

Wishing for Wine

While he was rooting around in the basement, a man found a magic lamp. When he rubbed it, a genie emerged in a huge cloud of pink smoke. "I am the all-powerful genie. I shall grant you one wish." The man thought about this, and decided that if there was one thing he couldn't get enough of, it was wine. "I wish I could pee wine. That's my wish." "Granted." And the genie disappeared. Later that day, the man's wife came home to find her husband naked, holding a glass. "Why only one glass?" asked her wife. "You're drinking out of the bottle tonight."

Hitler Abstains

Q: Why didn't Hitler drink tequila?
A: Cause it made him mean.