Jokes about Families - Father Jokes

Phone Call

"Hi Mom, it's me." "Hi Sally, are you okay? I thought you were with your father at the hardware store, looking for a drill." "Yeah, I was, but I got arrested and they've let me make one phone call, and that's why I'm calling you." "Oh my God, what happened?"
"Oh, I punched this African-American woman in the face." "What on earth . . . Why did you do that?"
"Well, it really wasn't my fault. Dad told me to find a Black and Decker. Mom, I knocked the shit out of her!"

Categories: Telephone Jokes , Racist Jokes (Black Jokes) , Blonde Jokes (Dumb Blonde Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Father Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Daughter Jokes)
Anonymous

Like Mother Like Daughter

A man takes his 10 year old daughter to the doctor. He says "Doctor, I want to put her on the pill." The Doctor says "Why?!? Is she sexually active?" The guy says "Nah, she just lies there like her mother."

Categories: Dark Humor Jokes (Pedophile Jokes) , Word Play Jokes , Jokes about Families (Father Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Daughter Jokes)
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Anonymous

Oldest

Dad: "You ask too many questions. Just like your older brother used to."
Me: "But... I'm the oldest."
Dad: "You are now"

Categories: Dark Humor Jokes (Death Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Father Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Son Jokes)
Anonymous