Fishing with Jack

A man is going fishing one day. After awhile, he runs out of bait. He sees a snake nearby with a frog in its mouth. Knowing that a frog will make good bait, he catches the snake. He removes the frog, and thinks to himself, "How do I let the snake go without getting bit?" He ponders for a minute, then, with his free hand, reaches for his bottle of Jack Daniels whiskey. He pops it open and pours some in the snake's mouth. The snake goes limp and the man tosses it away. Later, as he is getting ready to go home, he feels something on his foot. The man looks down to see the snake next to the whiskey, this time with two frogs in its mouth.

Whiskey Duck

So Daffy Duck and Elmer Fudd break into a distillery.
Daffy turns to Elmer and says: "Is this Whiskey?"
Elmer says: "Yeth, but not as whiskey as wobbing a bank!"

A Guide to Opening a Beer

Q: How do you open a can of beer?
A: That's not the point - it should be open when she gives it to you!