Word Play Jokes

Bill O'Reilly Kills a Pig

Bill O'Reilly and his chauffeur accidentally hit and kill a farmer's pig while driving through the country. O'Reilly tells the chauffeur to apologize to the farmer. They drive up to the farm, and the chauffeur goes inside. He is gone for a long time. When the driver returns, he explains his long absence, "Well, first the farmer shook my hand, then he offered me a beer, then his wife made me some cookies, and his daughter showered me with kisses." "Why were they so grateful?" O'Reilly asks. The chauffeur replies, "I don't know. All I told him was that I was Bill O'Reilly's driver and I'd just killed the pig."

Categories: Animal Jokes (Pig Jokes) , Pop Culture / Celebrity Jokes , Word Play Jokes
Anonymous

An Honest Lawyer

Q: What do you call an honest lawyer?
A: An oxymoron.

Categories: Profession Jokes (Lawyer Jokes) , Riddles , Word Play Jokes
Anonymous

Costume Party

My best friend showed up at my Halloween party dressed as an abacus.
I knew I could count on him.

Categories: Funny Thoughts , Word Play Jokes , Holiday Jokes (Halloween Jokes)
Anonymous