Marriage Quotes

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
When a man brings his wife flowers for no reason, there's a reason. Molly
Always get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted a whole day.
In olden times, sacrifices were made at the altar, a practice that still continues.
Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.
I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

The Marriage Proposal

An elderly pair (he a widower, she a widow) meet in a retirement village. They seem to hit it off; they share each other's values, enjoy the same jokes, and find pleasure in each other's company. After a few months, the widower asks for the hand of the widow in marriage. She appears hesitant and decided to probe her soon-to-be a little."Perhaps I shouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth, but... How's your health?" "It's OK", he answers. "I'm not getting any younger, but I don't have any major health problems. I can still enjoy life." "Well, then," she replies "I don't want to be a snoop, but I've got to protect myself: how are you fixed financially?" "So-so. I'm not rich, but I'm comfortable. You don't have to worry about me sponging off you; I can support myself." The little old lady blushes, and finally asks her swain - "And how's your sex life...." "Infrequently," he declares. The widow ponders this for a moment or so, before asking... "And is that one word or two?

Top Ten Things Men Know About Women

Top 10 things men know about women:

1. They have tits
2. They have tits
3. They have tits
4. They have tits
5. They have tits
6. They have tits
7. They have tits
8. They have tits
9. They have tits
10. They have tits