Sex Jokes - Private Parts
The pro quarterback was petitioning the court to have his recent marriage annulled. "On what grounds ?" questioned the Judge, "This court does not take annulments lightly." "Non-virginity," replied the quarterback, "When I married her, I thought I was getting a tight end, but instead, I found that I had married a wide receiver."
First Hand Testing
During a recent study, it was found that the average male penis measures five and a half inches.
That study was conducted by your mom.
INTERVIEWER: Tell me, what's your biggest strength?
APPLICANT: I work hard
INTERVIEWER: That's exactly what we're looking for. Welcome to the porn industry, son.
Green And Yellow
Q: What's green and yellow and eats nuts?
Blowjob On Heinz
A woman was engaged to get married. She had never had any sexual experience whatsoever. So she asked a couple of her friends what she could do to her husband on their wedding night to really impress him. One of her friends suggested that she give him a blowjob. She asked what a blowjob was, but they were all too embarrassed to tell her. Finally one friend told her to just go home and practice on a ketchup bottle. So she practiced for months. Finally the big night came. They got married, went to the hotel room and she got ready to do her thing. She unzipped his pants, got down on her knees, grabbed his penis in her hand, took a deep breath... and started smacking the tip of it with the palm of her other hand.