The Girl With Two Black Eyes?
Q: What do you say to a girl with two black eyes?
A: Nothing, you already told the bitch twice.
Jumping the Gun
I went to a crematorium to plan my wife's funeral, but apparently she has to be dead first.
A Woman with Two Black Eyes
Q: What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?
A: Nothing! You already told her twice!
I spent a few hours by my wife's grave today.
She thinks I'm digging a pond.
OJ Simpson in West Virginia?
Q: Why did OJ Simpson want to move to West Virginia?
A: Everyone has the same DNA.