Animal Jokes

Q: Why was the mommy horse upset with her son the mule?

A: Because he came out half-assed.

Q: Why do women have one more brain cell than a horse?

A: For managing not to drink the water from the bucket while she sweeps the floor.

My cat coughed up furballs this morning

Might seem normal to you but Furballs was my hamster

Q: How do you make a butterfly?

A: Flick it out of the butter dish with a knife!

A traveling salesman stopped alongside a field on a country road to rest a few minutes. The man had just closed his eyes when a horse came to the fence and began to boast about his past. "Yes sir, I'm a fine horse. I've run in 25 races and won over $5 million. I keep my trophies in the barn. "The salesman worked out the value of having a talking horse, found the horse's owner and offered a handsome sum for the animal. "Oh, you don't want that horse," said the farmer. "Yes I do," said the salesman, "and I'll give you $10,000 for the horse. "Recognizing a good deal, the farmer said without hesitation, "He's yours." While he wrote out his check, the salesman asked, "By the way, why wouldn't I want your horse?" "Because," said the farmer, "he's a liar - he hasn't won a race in his life."