Q: What did the hungry Dalmatian say when he had a meal?
A: That hit the spots!
Q: Why did the dog sit in the shade?
A: Because he didn't want to be a hot dog!
Ladies Night Out
Three women went out drinking and decided to have a contest to see who could get the drunkest. The next day the women all got together.
The first woman said, "I drove my car into a ditch."
The second woman said, "I blew chunks."
The third woman said, "I burned down my house."
After they all had told their stories, the third woman said, "I guess I won!" The second woman said, "Wait a minute, you don't understand, Chunks is my dog."
You might be a redneck if...
You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree to relieve yourselves.
Q: What do you get if you cross a Collie with a rose?
A: A collie-flower!