Wife Places ad for Husband

I have received hundreds of replies to my ad for a husband. They all say the same thing - "Take mine."

I don't know her

A couple walking in the park noticed a young man and woman sitting on a bench, passionately kissing. "Why don't you do that?" said the wife. "Honey," replied her husband, "I don't even know that woman!

Good Ring Bearer

At a friend's wedding, everything went smoothly until it was time for the flower girl and her young escort to come down the aisle. The boy stopped at every pew, growling at the guests.
Asked afterward why he behaved so badly, he explained, "I was just trying to be a good ring bear."