Dear Abby: Lying Cheat

Dear Abby: My husband is a lying cheat. He tells me he loves me, but he has cheated our entire marriage. He is a good provider and has many friends and supporters. They know he is a lying cheat, but they just avoid the issue. He is a hard worker but many of his coworkers are leery of him. Every time he gets caught, he denies it all. Then he admits that he was wrong and begs me to forgive him. This has been going on for so long, everyone in town knows he is a cheat. I don't know what to do.
Signed - Frustrated
 
Dear Frustrated: You should dump him. Now that you are finally a New York Senator, you don't need him anymore.

Chinese Detective

A man suspected his wife was cheating on him, so when he left town, he hired a famous Chinese detective to investigate. A few days later, he received this letter:
Most Honorable Sir,
You leave house, he come to house. He and she leave house, I follow. He and she go to hotel, I climb tree to see. He kiss she, she kiss he. He strip she, she strip he. I play with me, I fall out of tree, I not see.
No fee,
Chen Lee

The Whole Truth

At school, Little Johnny was told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth."  Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out. He goes home, and as he is greeted by his mother he says, "I know the whole truth." His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, "Just don't tell your father." Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth." The father promptly hands him $40 and says, "Please don't say a word to your mother." Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, "I know the whole truth." The mailman immediately drops the mail, opens his arms, and says, "Then come give your real father a big hug!"