Relationship Jokes - Cheater Jokes

Irish Sinner

Murphy showed up at Mass one Sunday and the priest almost fell down when he saw him. He'd never been to church in his life. After Mass, the priest caught up with him and said, "Murphy, I am so glad ya decided to come to Mass. What made ya come?" Murphy said, "I got to be honest with you Father, a while back, I misplaced me hat and I really, really love that hat. I know that McGlynn had a hat just like mine and I knew he came to church every Sunday. I also knew that he had to take off his hat during Mass and figured he would leave it in the back of church. So, I was going to leave after Communion and steal McGlynn's hat." The priest said, "Well, Murphy, I notice that ya didn't steal McGlynn's hat. What changed your mind?"
Murphy replied, "Well, after I heard your sermon on the 10 Commandments, I decided that I didn't need to steal McGlynn's hat after all." With a tear in his eye the priest gave Murphy a big smile and said; "After I talked about 'Thou Shalt Not Steal' ya decided you would rather do without your hat than burn in Hell?" Murphy slowly shook his head. "No, Father, after ya talked about 'Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery' I remembered where I left me hat.

Categories: Funny Thoughts , Ethnic / Country Jokes (Irish Jokes) , Religion Jokes (Nun / Priest Jokes) , Religion Jokes (Catholic Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Cheater Jokes)
Anonymous

Best Friend

A guy is talking to his best friend. He tells him, "I haven't  made love with her for a month.  She's carrying a strange virus that can leave me deaf if I have any sort of sexual intercourse with her."
The friend replied, "Talk louder man, I can't hear a thing you're saying."

Categories: Sex Jokes , Relationship Jokes (Cheater Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Marriage Jokes) , Disease / Afflictions Jokes (STD Jokes)
Anonymous

Drilling Rights

Storming into his lawyer's office, a Texas oil magnate demanded that divorce proceedings begin at once against his young bride. "What's the problem?" "I want to hit that adultering bitch for breach of contract," snapped the oil man. "I don't know if that will fly," said the lawyer. "I mean your wife isn't a piece of property; you don't own her!" "Damn right," the tycoon rejoined, "but I sure as hell expect exclusive drillin' rights!

Categories: Relationship Jokes (Marriage Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Cheater Jokes) , Profession Jokes (Lawyer Jokes) , Sex Jokes , Relationship Jokes (Man Criticizes Woman) , Word Play Jokes
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous