School Jokes - Elementary School Jokes

Q: What time is it when little white flakes fall past the classroom window?

A: Snow and Tell.

A teacher was teaching a class of five year olds and asked what they all did in the summer holidays. One boy said he got a ''choo-choo.'' The teacher said, "Please use the proper grown-up word for what you have done. The word is train." Another boy said he got a ''bow-wow.'' The teacher said please use the proper grown-up word for what you have done. The word is dog." Another boy said I got a ''Winnie the Shit.''

Little Sally came home from school with a smile on her face, and told her mother, "Frankie Brown showed me his weenie today at the playground!" Before the mother could raise a concern, "Sally went on to say, "It reminded me of a peanut." Relaxing with a hidden smile, Sally's mom asked, "Really small, was it?" Sally replied, "No, salty." Her mom fainted.

One day there was a boy at school. He needed to go to the toilet. The teacher said "Say your ABCs first" The boy started saying "A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O Q R S T U V W X Y Z" The teacher asked at the end "Where is your P?" The boy answered "Running down my pants!!"

Three 3rd Graders: an Irish kid, an Italian kid and a Black kid, are on the playground at recess. The Irish kid suggests that they play a new game. "Let's see who has the largest weenie," he says. "Okay." They all agree. 

The Irish kid pulls down his zipper and whips it out.  "That's nothing," says the Italian kid. He whips his out, and proudly shows that his is at least an inch longer. Not to be outdone, the Black kid whips his out. It is by far, not only the biggest, but the fattest.

That night, eating dinner at home, the Black kid's mother asks him what he did at school today. "Oh, we worked on a science project, had a math test, and read out loud from a new book, and then during recess, my friends and I played a new game called 'Let's see who has the largest weenie." "What kind of game is that, honey?" asks the mother. "Well, me, Anthony and Patrick each pulled out our weenies, and I had the biggest! The other kids say it's because I'm Black. Is that true?

"No, Leroy. It's because you're eighteen."