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The best jokes and joke writers!

Obama On Halloween

Q: Why did Obama dress as a ghost for Halloween? 

A: He wanted to see what it was like to be white for a day!

Hillary's Wake-up Call

Hillary phoned Trump's office shortly after midnight. “I need to talk to President Trump, it’s an emergency!” exclaimed Hillary. After some cajoling, the president's assistant agreed to wake him up. “So, what is it that’s so important that it can’t wait until morning,”  grumbled Trump.“ A Supreme Court Judge just died, and I want to take his place,” begged Hillary. “Well, it’s Okay with me if it’s Okay with the mortuary,” replied President Trump.

Clinton Intern Guidance

Q:  What does Clinton say to interns as they leave his office?

A: "Don't hit your head on the desk."

Why is the Government Like a Prostitute?

Q: Why is the government like a prostitute?

A: Your always getting screwed and you have to pay for it!

St. Obama

On a Saturday afternoon in Washington, DC an aide to President Barack Obama visited the Cardinal of the Catholic cathedral in Washington. He told the Cardinal that President Barack Obama would be attending the next mass, and he asked if the Cardinal would kindly point out Obama to the congregation and say a few words that would include calling Obama a saint.

The Cardinal replied, "No. I don't really like the man, and there are issues of conflict with the Catholic Church over certain of Obama's views." Obama's aide then said, "Look, I'll write a check here and now for a donation of $10,000,000 to your church if you'll just tell the congregation you see Obama as a saint.” The Cardinal thought about it and said, "Well, the church can use the money, so I'll work your request into tomorrow's sermon.”

As Obama's aide promised, Obama appeared for the Sunday worship and seated himself prominently at the forward left side of the center aisle. As promised, at the start of his sermon, the Cardinal pointed out that Obama was present. The Cardinal went on to explain to the congregation, "While President Obama's presence is probably an honor to some, the man is not numbered among my personal favorite personages. Some of his views are contrary to tenets of the Church, and he tends to flip-flop on many other issues. Barack Obama is a petty, self-absorbed hypocrite, a thumb sucker and a nit-wit. Barack Obama is also a serial liar, a cheat and a thief. I must say, Barack Obama is the worst example of a Christian I have ever personally witnessed. He is a narcissist and is using his speaking ability to lie to the American people.

He also has a reputation for shirking his obligations, both In Washington and in Illinois. The man is simply not to be trusted.”

The Cardinal concluded, "But, when compared with Hillary Clinton, Obama is a Saint."