Relationship Jokes

Love, Love, Love

One of the most painful things in the world is when you say "I love you" and it isn't reciprocated
Especially when you've just said it to your parents

Copyright © 2014 - Kiel Phillips - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Written By: KielPhillips

Point of View

  1. I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.
  2. It's not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer.
  3. Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was damned near impossible.
  4. A man complaining to a friend: "I had it all - money, a beautiful house, a big car, the love of a beautiful woman ... then ...pow!...it was.. all gone!" "What happened?" asked the friend. "Ahhh my wife found out!
  5. Wife: Let's go out and have some fun tonight. Husband: Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway light on.
  6. How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened by the time she brings it to the couch.
  7. A man rushes into his house and yells to his wife, "Martha, pack up your things! I just won the California lottery!" Martha responds excitedly, "Shall I pack for warm weather or cold?!" The man responds, "I don't care... just so long as you're out of the house by noon!"
  8. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street bald and still think they are beautiful.
  9. A man without a woman is like a fish without a bicycle.
  10. If your wife and a lawyer were drowning and you had to choose would you go to lunch or to a movie?
  11. A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he's finished.

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Commitment Definition

Having spent half the night discussing involvement vs. commitment (one of my favorite topics when I've had a couple of glasses of wine and am feeling particularly cranky) with my boyfriend, I was quite amused to see the following saying pop up when I logged in the next morning:
Commitment, n.: Commitment can be best illustrated by a breakfast of ham and eggs. The chicken was involved, the pig was committed.

Categories: Relationship Jokes
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous