We're sorry, but it appears that you are using an anonymous proxy. To prevent fraudulent voting, we don't allow votes from anonymous proxies.

This contest requires users to be registered in order to vote.

You must be a registered user to submit a joke.  But registering is FREE and don’t worry, we only need a name and e-mail address, and we don’t sell or share your information with any third-parties (see Privacy Policy).

You must complete account validation before submitting jokes. Click here to go to your profile page to complete the process.

We’re sorry, but your browser settings indicate that you don’t want to be tracked.  You can either disable that setting or simply register for a FREE account, so we’ll know that you want us to track your preferences and feedback.  Don’t worry, we only need a name and e-mail address and we don’t sell or share your information with any third-parties (see Privacy Policy).


The best jokes and joke writers!

Rolling

I fondly remember our childhood when Dad used to roll us down the hill in a tire.

Those were the Good Years.

Jumping Turtle

A little turtle begins to climb a tree slowly. After long hours of effort, he reaches the top then jumps into the air waving his front legs until he lands on the ground with a hard knock on his shell. After recovering his consciousness, he starts to climb the tree again, jumps again, and knocks the ground heavily again.The little turtle insisted again and again, jumping and hitting the ground with a thud. A couple of birds sitting at the edge of a branch watched the turtle with sympathy. After several jumps, the female bird said to the male, "Dear, I think it's time to tell our little turtle he is adopted."

Lucky

A boy asks his mom, "Why am I black and you're white?" She says, "Don't even go there. The way that party went, you're lucky you don't bark."

Perfect

Little Johnny walked in one day on his daddy in the bathroom. He asked his father what that was hanging between his legs. His father replied that it was the perfect penis. The next day at school, Johnny pulled his pants down in front of his classmates.
''What's that?'' asked Jenny.
''Well,'' said Johnny, ''if it was about 3 inches smaller, it would be the perfect penis.'''

Kentucky Kid

A kid, just getting home from school runs up to his dad.

"Daddy, daddy! I'm the only one in my class that can count to ten. Why do you reckon so?" he asked.

"Why, that's because your from Kentucky son." The dad responsed.

The next day the kid gets home from school.

"Daddy, daddy! I'm the only one in my class that knows all the letters in the alphabet. Why do you reckon so?"

"That's because you're from Kentucky son." The dad tells him again.

The next day the kid busts through the door.

"Daddy. daddy! I'm the only one in school who has a large penis, is that because I'm from Kentucky?"

The dad looks at him and says, "No that's because you're 22."