Relationship Jokes

Hard Times at Work

It had taken him several months, but the executive vice president had finally persuaded his new secretary to bend over the back of his leather couch and allow him to have sex with her that way. "And just where have you been until this hour?" demanded his wife, when the wayward husband finally arrived home. "Down at the office," he replied, "working like a dog."

Categories: Work & Office Jokes (Office Sex Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Cheater Jokes)
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Anonymous

Irish Sinner

Murphy showed up at Mass one Sunday and the priest almost fell down when he saw him. He'd never been to church in his life. After Mass, the priest caught up with him and said, "Murphy, I am so glad ya decided to come to Mass. What made ya come?" Murphy said, "I got to be honest with you Father, a while back, I misplaced me hat and I really, really love that hat. I know that McGlynn had a hat just like mine and I knew he came to church every Sunday. I also knew that he had to take off his hat during Mass and figured he would leave it in the back of church. So, I was going to leave after Communion and steal McGlynn's hat." The priest said, "Well, Murphy, I notice that ya didn't steal McGlynn's hat. What changed your mind?"
Murphy replied, "Well, after I heard your sermon on the 10 Commandments, I decided that I didn't need to steal McGlynn's hat after all." With a tear in his eye the priest gave Murphy a big smile and said; "After I talked about 'Thou Shalt Not Steal' ya decided you would rather do without your hat than burn in Hell?" Murphy slowly shook his head. "No, Father, after ya talked about 'Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery' I remembered where I left me hat.

Categories: Funny Thoughts , Ethnic / Country Jokes (Irish Jokes) , Religion Jokes (Nun / Priest Jokes) , Religion Jokes (Catholic Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Cheater Jokes)
Anonymous

Wife's Diagnosis

A woman and her husband go to the doctor because the woman is complaining of shortness of breath. After fifteen minutes, the woman comes out into the waiting room. "Apparently, my problem is that I have a nice cooter." "Excuse me?" says the husband. "That's what the doctor said. My problem is that I have a nice cooter." The husband is a bit angry and goes in to talk to the doctor. "What's this about my wife having a nice cooter? I need a damn good explanation." "That's not what I said," says the doctor. "I said she has acute angina."

Categories: Disease / Afflictions Jokes , Relationship Jokes (Marriage Jokes) , Sex Jokes (Private Parts)
Anonymous