Money Jokes

Knock Knock - Texas

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Texas!
Texas who?
Texas are getting higher every year!

Categories: U.S. State Jokes (Texas Jokes) , Knock-Knock Jokes , Money Jokes
Anonymous

Jesus Has Risen

Easter is approaching. Father O'Maley checks estimates for the flower decoration of the altar. The catholic florist charges $300. "Too expensive" moans the priest. The protestant florist charged $250, "No, it would not be right to buy at another Christian believer, especially as the price difference is rather small." However, Solly Goldberg charges $75! Religion or economics? After much consideration, Solly obtains the contract. On Easter Sunday morning, Goldberg's men deliver the flowers: wonderful roses, azaleas, camellias, tulips and carnations. O'Maley's last reservations are discarded. When the parishioners arrive in the church, they see the magnificent flower arrangement and a ribbon with the inscription: "Jesus has risen! But the prices of Goldberg always stay the same."

Categories: Religion Jokes (Catholic Jokes) , Religion Jokes (Jewish Jokes) , Money Jokes , Word Play Jokes , Holiday Jokes (Easter Jokes)
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Anonymous

Broke Drinker

A man goes into a bar and seats himself on a stool. The bartender looks at him and says, "What'll it be buddy?" The man says, "Set me up with seven whiskey shots and make them doubles." The bartender does this and watches the man slug one down, then the next, then the next, and so on until all seven are gone almost as quickly as they were served. Staring in disbelief, the bartender asks why he's doing all this drinking. "You'd drink them this fast too if you had what I have." The bartender hastily asks, "What do you have pal?" The man quickly replies, "I have a dollar."

Categories: Funny Thoughts , Money Jokes (Poor People Jokes) , Bar Jokes , Alcohol Jokes (Whiskey Jokes)
Anonymous