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Funny Thoughts
A Fortunate Coincidence
John: "I'm glad you named me John."
Mother: "Why?"
John: "Because that's what all the kids at school call me."
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Little Johnny - Stupid
A new teacher tries to make use of her psychology courses. The first day of class, she starts by saying, "Everyone who thinks they're stupid, stand up!" After a few seconds, Little Johnny stands up. The teacher asks, "Do you think you're stupid, Johnny?" "No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself."
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Why Rednecks have low Stress
Rednecks have the lowest stress rate because they don't understand the seriousness of most medical terminology
Medical Term : Redneck Definition
Artery : The study of paintings
Bacteria : Back door to cafeteria
Barium : What doctors do when patients die
Benign : What you be, after you be eight
Caesarean Section : A neighborhood in Rome
Cat scan : Searching for Kitty
Cauterize : Made eye contact with her
Colic : A sheep dog
Coma : A punctuation mark
Dilate : To live long
Enema : Not a friend
Fester : Quicker than someone else
Fibula : A small lie
Impotent : Distinguished, well known
Labor Pain : Getting hurt at work
Medical Staff : A Doctor's cane
Morbid : A higher offer
Nitrates : Rates of Pay for Working at Night
Node : I knew it
Outpatient : A person who has fainted
Pelvis : Second cousin to Elvis
Post Operative : A letter carrier
Recovery Room : Place to do upholstery
Rectum : Nearly killed him
Secretion : Hiding something
Seizure : Roman Emperor
Tablet : A small table
Terminal Illness : Getting sick at the airport
Tumor : One plus one more
Urine : Opposite of you're out
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