Funny Thoughts

Cheating Wife

A man goes to a shrink and says, "Doctor, my wife is unfaithful to me. Every evening, she goes to Larry's bar and picks up men. In fact, she sleeps with anybody who asks her! I'm going crazy. What do you think I should do?" "Relax," says the doctor, "Take a deep breath and calm down. Now, tell me, exactly where is Larry's bar?"

Categories: Funny Thoughts , Sexist Jokes (About Women) , Relationship Jokes (Man Criticizes Woman) , Profession Jokes (Psychiatrist Jokes)
Anonymous

DNR

A husband and wife were sitting at home when the husband suddenly said, "Honey, just so you know, I never want to be kept alive in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug."
So the wife got up, pulled the plug on the T.V. and threw out all of his beer.

Categories: Funny Thoughts , Word Play Jokes , Dark Humor Jokes (Death Jokes) , Alcohol Jokes (Beer Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Marriage Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Woman Criticizes Man)
Submitted BY: kaiofthelexx1

Spray Down

Q: Why do black people have white hands and feet?
A: That is where God stood them up against the wall to spray them.

Categories: Funny Thoughts , Racist Jokes (Black Jokes) , Religion Jokes (God Jokes) , Word Play Jokes , Riddles
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Anonymous