Jokes about Families - Father Jokes

Teaching Moment

A man is driving his five-year-old to a friend’s house when another car races in front and cuts them off, nearly causing an accident. “Douche bag!” the father yells. A moment later he realizes the indiscretion, pulls over, and turns to face his son. “Your daddy just said a bad word,” he says. “I was angry at that driver, but that was no excuse for what I said. It was wrong. But just because I said it doesn’t make it right, and I don’t ever want to hear you saying it. Is that clear?” His son looks at him and says: “Too late, douche bag.”

Categories: Funny Thoughts , Jokes about Families (Father Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Son Jokes) , Insult Jokes (Stupid Insults)
Anonymous

Irish Tradition

I was reading an article last night about fathers and sons, and memories came flooding back of the time I took my son out for his first pint.
Off we went to our local pub which is only two blocks from the house. I got him a Guinness. He didn't like it, so I drank it. Then I got him a Stroh’s, he didn't like that either, so I drank it. It was the same with the Molson's and the Labatt's.
I thought maybe he'd like whiskey better than beer so we tried a Jameson's, nope! By the time I realized he just didn't like to drink I was so fookin' shit-faced I could hardly push the stroller back home!

Categories: Holiday Jokes (St. Patrick's Day Jokes) , Ethnic / Country Jokes (Irish Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Son Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Father Jokes) , Bar Jokes (Drunk Jokes)
Anonymous

Laugh Till You Cry

Little Johnny came in from the backyard sobbing. His mother asked "What's the matter?" "Dad was fixing the fence and hit his thumb with the hammer," he said through his tears. "That's not so serious," his mother said, "and a big boy like you shouldn't cry about that. Why didn't you just laugh?" "I did!" cried Johnny.

Categories: Little Johnny / Suzie Jokes (At Home) , Jokes about Families (Mother Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Son Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Father Jokes) , Word Play Jokes
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Anonymous