Bar Jokes - Drunk Jokes

Arriving Home Drunk

A man is in a bar, falling off his stool every couple of minutes. He is obviously drunk.
So the bartender says to another man in the bar: "Why don't you be a good Samaritan and take him home?"
The man takes the drunk out the door and to his car, and he stumbles at least ten times. They drive along and the drunk points out his house to the man. He stops the car and the drunk stumbles up the steps to his house with the man.The drunk's wife greets them at the door.
"Why thank you for bringing him home for me," she says, "but where is his wheel chair?"

Categories: Bar Jokes (Drunk Jokes) , Disability Jokes (Paraplegic Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Miss Manners

A woman walks up to an obnoxious drunk at a bar and tells him, "If you were my husband, I'd poison your drink." The man replies, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."

Categories: Bar Jokes (Drunk Jokes) , Drug Jokes , Relationship Jokes (Woman Criticizes Man)
Anonymous

Men And Pigs

Q: What is the difference between men and pigs?
A: Pigs don't turn into men when they drink.

Categories: Animal Jokes (Pig Jokes) , Alcohol Jokes , Bar Jokes (Drunk Jokes) , Riddles , Word Play Jokes , Relationship Jokes (Woman Criticizes Man) , Sexist Jokes (About Men)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous