Bar Jokes

The Fight!

Kelly limps into his favorite pub, "My god! What happened to you?" the bartender asked Kelly as he hobbled in on a crutch, one arm in a cast. "I got in a tiff with Riley", whispered Kelly to the bartender.
"Riley? He's just a wee fellow," the barkeep said surprised. "He must have had something in his hand."
"That he did," Kelly said. "A shovel it was."
"Dear Lord. Didn't you have anything in your hand?"
"Aye, that I did - Mrs. Riley's right tit." Kelly said. "And a beautiful thing it was, but not much use in a fight!"

Categories: Bar Jokes (Bar Fight Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Cheater Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Unbelievable Coincidence

A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. Curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Mally twins are drunk again."

Categories: Ethnic / Country Jokes (Irish Jokes) , Bar Jokes (Drunk Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Too Much Celebrating

The couple was dining out when the wife noticed a familiar face at the bar. "Elliot," she said, pointing, "do you see that man downing bourbon at the bar?"
The husband looked over and nodded. "Well," the woman continued, "he's been drinking like that for 10 years, ever since I jilted him!"
The husband returned to his meal. "Nonsense," he said, "even that's not worth so much celebrating!"

Categories: Relationship Jokes (Marriage Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Man Criticizes Woman) , Relationship Jokes (Break-up Jokes) , Alcohol Jokes (Whiskey Jokes) , Bar Jokes (Drunk Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous