My Guinness

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman each order a Guinness in a pub. Upon being served, each finds a fly in their beer. Repulsed, the Englishman sends his back. The Scotsman gently flicks the fly out of his mug and begins drinking. The Irishman, carefully lifts the fly up by its wings and screams, "Spit it out! Spit it out!"

West Virginia Drinking

Q: Did you hear that they have raised the minimum drinking age in West Virginia to 32? 
A: It seems they want to keep alcohol out of the high schools!

Man Torture

Q: What's the best way to torture a man?
A: Put a naked woman and a six-pack in front of him. Then tell him to pick only one.