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The best jokes and joke writers!

Three Surgeons

Once there were three surgeons engaged in conversation. They got on the topic of their occupation and each stated who they liked to operate on. The first doctor said, "I like to work on electricians." "Why?" the others replied. He answered, "When you open them up, they are all color coded so you know where everything goes." The second doctor said, "I like to work on librarians." "Why?"  the other doctors asked. He replied, "Librarians are all organized in a sophisticated pattern." The third doctor said, "Well, I like to work on lawyers."  "Lawyers?!" replied the others surprised. "Yes, Lawyers" he stated. "But why?" they asked him. "Well, they are gutless, they have no spine, and their heads and butts are inter-changeable."

First Aid Course

When a car skidded on wet pavement and struck a telephone pole, several bystanders ran over to help the driver. A women was the first to reach the victim, but a man rushed in and pushed her aside. 'Step aside, lady,' he barked. 'I've taken a course in first-aid!' The women watched for a few minutes, then tapped him on the shoulder. 'Pardon me,' she said. 'But when you get to the part about calling a doctor, I'm right here.'


A pipe burst in a doctor's house. He called a plumber. The plumber arrived, unpacked his tools, did mysterious plumber-type things for a while, and handed the doctor a bill for $600. The doctor exclaimed, "This is ridiculous! I don't even make that much as a doctor..." The plumber waited for him to finish his ranting, then replied... "Neither did I when I was a doctor!"


Q: "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

A: "A doctor."

Q: "And why's that?"

A: "Because it's the only profession where you can tell women to take off their clothes and then stick their husbands with the bill."

National Pastime

Show me a man that thinks baseball is the national pastime and I'll show you a man who never played doctor when he was a kid!