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The best jokes and joke writers!

First Aid Course

When a car skidded on wet pavement and struck a telephone pole, several bystanders ran over to help the driver. A women was the first to reach the victim, but a man rushed in and pushed her aside. 'Step aside, lady,' he barked. 'I've taken a course in first-aid!' The women watched for a few minutes, then tapped him on the shoulder. 'Pardon me,' she said. 'But when you get to the part about calling a doctor, I'm right here.'

Plumbing

A pipe burst in a doctor's house. He called a plumber. The plumber arrived, unpacked his tools, did mysterious plumber-type things for a while, and handed the doctor a bill for $600. The doctor exclaimed, "This is ridiculous! I don't even make that much as a doctor..." The plumber waited for him to finish his ranting, then replied... "Neither did I when I was a doctor!"

Doctor

Q: "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

A: "A doctor."

Q: "And why's that?"

A: "Because it's the only profession where you can tell women to take off their clothes and then stick their husbands with the bill."

National Pastime

Show me a man that thinks baseball is the national pastime and I'll show you a man who never played doctor when he was a kid!

Who's Got My Pen?

A doctor walked into a bank; preparing to endorse a check, he pulled a rectal thermometer out of his shirt pocket and tried to write with it. Realizing his mistake, he looked at the thermometer with annoyance and said, "Well that's great, just great...some asshole's got my pen."