Help Please

I told the doctor I had to see him right away because I thought I was shrinking.
He told me he was busy and that I'd have to be a little patient.

Good Work Day

Q: How do you know when it's going to be a good day at work?
A: When you see your boss' picture on the side of the milk carton.

Daddy's Occupation

A grade school teacher asks her students what their parents do for a living. Billy proudly stands up and announces, "My daddy plays piano in a whorehouse." The teacher is aghast and promptly changes the subject. Later that day, she calls Billy's mother and explains what Billy said. Billy's mother says, "Actually, his father's an attorney, but how can we explain a thing like that to a seven-year-old?"