The Little Boy Went to the Whore House
There was this little boy who went in the whore house with a dead frog on a leash. He went to the counter and asked the pimp for a whore with aids, the man knew he was young but the boy said "please mister, just give me a whore with aids. I have money that is no problem." the man was like ok "if you have the money." So the boy went in and fucked the whore and came out smiling to the man at the counter. The guy didn't understand why he was so happy. "it’s a long story" the boy said. "Tell me, I can wait" the man said impatiently. "Ok" the boy says "I have aids now right? Well--I'll go home and screw the babysitter...she'll get aids, then my dad will come home and screw her...he'll get aids, my dad will screw my mom...she'll get aids. Then my mom will then screw the milk man...and he's the son of a bitch that ran over my frog!"
Q: Why did the student eat her homework?
A: Because the teacher said it would be a 'piece of cake'.
Answer This Question
One day, a teacher walks into her classroom and announces to the class that on each Friday, she will ask a question to the class and anyone who answers correctly doesn't have to go to school the following Monday.
On the first Friday, the teacher asks, "How many grains of sand are on the beach?"
Needless to say, no one could answer. The following Friday, the teacher asks the class, "How many stars are in the sky?" and again no one could answer.
Frustrated, little Johnny decides that the next Friday, he would somehow answer the question and get a 3 day weekend. So Thursday night, Johnny takes two ping-pong balls and paints them black. The next day, he brings them to school in a paper bag. At the end of the day, just when the teacher says, "Here's this week's question," Johnny empties the bag to the floor sending the ping-pong balls rolling to the front of the room. Because they are young kids who find any disruption of class amusing, the entire class starts laughing.
The teacher says, " Okay, who's the comedian with the black balls?"
Immediately, little Johnny stands up and says, "Bill Cosby, see ya on Tuesday!"
A fat teenager is sitting on a park bench eating a huge bag of potato chips.
The man sitting next to him looks over and says, "Eating too much junk food is bad for you." The boy looked over and replied, "My great grandfather lived to be one hundred and five". The man replies, "And he ate lots of junk food?"
"No" says the boy, "he minded his own fucking business."
Q: Why did the boy take a ladder to school?
A: It was a high school.