Like Mother Like Daughter

A man takes his 10 year old daughter to the doctor. He says "Doctor, I want to put her on the pill." The Doctor says "Why?!? Is she sexually active?" The guy says "Nah, she just lies there like her mother."

Flea Bite

Q: How do you find where a flea has bitten you?
A: Start from scratch!

Pick-Up Lines Galore

• I wish you were a door so I could bang you all day long.
• (Lick finger and wipe on shirt) Let's get you out of these wet clothes.
• Nice legs....what time do they open?
• Do you work for UPS? I thought I saw you checking out my package.
• You've got 206 bones in your body, want 1 more?
• I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a BIG BREASTED BED THRASHER, have you seen one?
• I'm fighting the urge to make you the happiest woman on earth tonight.
• Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille name tag.
• I'd really like to see how you look when I'm naked.
• Is that a ladder in you stockings or the stairway to heaven?
• You must be the limp doctor because I've got a stiffy.
• I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing you do with your tongue.
• You know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me.
• You. Me. Whipped cream. Handcuffs. Any questions?
• Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?
• Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.
• My friend wants to know if YOU think I'm cute?