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The best jokes and joke writers!

Two Old Friends

Two friends met after a long time, and chatted about what´s been going on since they last met. One of them had a new girlfriend and the other one asked about her cooking, her relation to his folks etc. etc. and finally asked "How is she in bed?" First guy replies "She´s fantastic, she sucks like a real man!"

The Camping Trip

Ron and James had been camping together for a week when they finally had enough of each other, so Ron had an idea for the two to wake up early the next day and hike in opposite directions for the day and meet at the campground for dinner. James agreed. So around six the next evening they meet up. Ron says "I hiked north and came up to a beautiful spring, I swam for a few hours, then stretched out on the shore to dry and I watched a deer drink from the spring... it was so wonderful." James said  "Wow, you had a good day. I went south and ran into some railroad tracks, I followed them east until I came across a woman tied to the tracks, I untied her and we had sex in every imaginable way all day." Ron was so jealous "Your day was so much better than mine... did you get a blow job?" "Nope" James replied, "I couldn't find her head!"

Man's Best Friend

Q: What is a man's best friend?

A: His dick because it always sitcks up for him.

When Man Is Smartest

Q: Why is a man at his smartest when he is having sex?

A: Because he's plugged into a woman!

10 Things to Never Say to a Naked Man

Uh...top 10 things not to say to a naked man:

  1.  Awww...that's cute
  2. Well, at least you're good at other things
  3. Do you think it'll fit in my old Barbie® clothes?
  4.  My li'l brother has one like that.
  5.  Are you cold?
  6. ...giggles...
  7.  Maybe we should just be friends
  8.  Can you make it dance?
  9.  Umm...maybe you should get dressed
  10.  Oh...look...its hiding!