Sex Jokes - Private Parts

Three blondes had boyfriends all named John and they kept getting confused. They decided to name them after sodas. The first girl said, "I'll call mine 7 Up, because he's seven inches and he's always up." The next girl said, "I'll call mine Mountain Dew, because he mounts me and knows exactly what to do." The last girl goes, "I'll call mine Jack Daniels." The other girls yelled at her and said, "That's not a soda! That's a hard licker!"

A little boy and a little girl, on a beach, are arguing. Little boy says to the little girl, "I have a Nintendo!" Little girl says,
"Oh yeah, well I have a Sega and a Nintendo!" Little boy says,
"So, my dad's a doctor!" Little girl says,
"My dad's an astronaut!" Back and forth they went, each one trying to out-do the other until finally the little boy pulls down his shorts and proclaims,
"But I have on of these!" and shows the little girl his penis. The little girl, not being able to retaliate, gets up and goes home. The next day, the little girl spots the little boy and proudly announces;
"My mom said that with one of these (pointing to her's) I can get as many of those as I want!"

Q: How are a vending machine and Monica Lewinsky alike?

A: They both have a place where you "Insert Bill Here"!

A guy goes into a bar and seats himself next to a hot looking woman. After a few drinks he musters the courage to talk to her. After a few more drinks and a little conversation he leans over to the woman and asks, "Can I smell your Pussy?" The woman is outraged and answers with a stern,
"Of course not!" The drunk man replies...
"Oh, then it must be your feet."

Q: Why do men name their penises?

A: Because they don't like the idea of having a stranger make 90% of their decisions!