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Sex Jokes - Private Parts
The Ongoing Note
Joe woke up one morning with an enormous boner and looked for his wife, but she had awakened and was preparing breakfast in the kitchen. Joe was afraid he might spoil things by getting up, so he called his little boy and sent this note to his wife: THE TENT POLE IS UP, THE CANVAS IS SPREAD. THE HELL WITH BREAKFAST, COME BACK TO BED.
The wife answered the note and sent it back by the boy. It read: TAKE THE TENT POLE DOWN, PUT THE CANVAS AWAY. THE MONKEY HAD A HEMORRHAGE, NO CIRCUS TODAY.
So he sent another note down. It read: THE TENT POLE'S STILL UP, AND THE CANVAS STILL SPREAD. SO DROP WHAT YOU'RE DOING, COME GIVE ME SOME HEAD.
To which she replied: I'M SURE THAT YOUR POLE'S THE BEST IN THE LAND. BUT I'M BUSY RIGHT NOW SO DO IT BY HAND!!
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Men and Women Qualities
Q: Why do men walk so fast?
A: They've got three legs!
Q: Why do women talk so much?
A: They've got two mouths!
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Looking for Love
An woman walks into a drug store and asks the man behind the counter if they sell extra large condoms. The clerk looks at the woman quizzically, but shrugs and tells her "Yes, we do. They're right here behind the counter." The woman thanks the clerk and sits down in a nearby chair. The clerk asks the woman, "Is there something else I can help you with, Ma'am?" The woman winks and smiles at the clerk and says "No, thank you. I'm just waiting here to see who buys them".
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