We're sorry, but it appears that you are using an anonymous proxy. To prevent fraudulent voting, we don't allow votes from anonymous proxies.

This contest requires users to be registered in order to vote.

You must be a registered user to submit a joke.  But registering is FREE and don’t worry, we only need a name and e-mail address, and we don’t sell or share your information with any third-parties (see Privacy Policy).

You must complete account validation before submitting jokes. Click here to go to your profile page to complete the process.

We’re sorry, but your browser settings indicate that you don’t want to be tracked.  You can either disable that setting or simply register for a FREE account, so we’ll know that you want us to track your preferences and feedback.  Don’t worry, we only need a name and e-mail address and we don’t sell or share your information with any third-parties (see Privacy Policy).


The best jokes and joke writers!

Humorous Moment

A cop pulls over a car. He walks up to the car, the driver lowers his window and a cloud of weed smoke pours out.  The cop looks at the driver and notices his eyes are as red as a stop sign. The cop then asks the driver, "How high are you?

The driver laughs and says, No officer, it's Hi, How are you...

Police Work

Q: Why was the Police officer standing on poop?

A: He was On-Duty.

Speeding

A police officer stopped a blonde for speeding and asked her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you took away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"

Day After Christmas

It's the day after Christmas and young Johnny rides his new bike up to a stop light where a policeman on his horse is waiting for the light to change. The policeman looks over at Johnny and says, "Got that bike for Christmas, sonny?" The youngster responds, proudly, "Ya, Santa brought it for me." The policeman then proceeds to write the young fellow a bicycle violation ticket for not having a reflector on the back bumper and hands it to him saying, "Well, next time you better tell him to put a light on it." Johnny looks at the citation, looks back up at the cop and says, "And did Santa bring you that horse?" Humoring the youngster, the policeman answers, "Why, yes, he did." To which Johnny responds, "Well, next time you better tell him to put the dick underneath the horse, not on top."

Creeper

I've been talking to a 13 year old girl for about 2 weeks now.

We've been texting a lot lately and she just told me she's an undercover cop.  That's quite impressive for her age.