Dumped By A Midget
Q: Why was the guy so downhearted after his midget girlfriend dumped him?
A: Because he was nuts over her.
Q: Why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun?
A: Because they're always a little short.
Q: Why do midgets laugh when they play soccer?
A: Because the grass tickles their balls!
A midget with a heavy lisp goes to a horse farm to purchase a horse. The owner of the farm takes him through to look at all of his horses. The owner is really getting pissed off. Finally, the last horse and the midget decided that he really wanted this horse. So he ask the owner if he could lift him up so he could look at the horses eyes. The owner did as the midget asked, and the midget said "Oh my, thse got very pretty eyez". Then the midget asked if he could lift him up so he could see her teeth, Then the midget said "Oh wow, thse got wonderful teeth." Then the midget asked if he could see her twat. The owner, being very pissed, picked him up, and rammed him in and out of the horse's twat. The midget looked up at the owner and said. "Oh my, yes she does have a very fine twat, but I guess I thoud have asked to see her gallop."
Q: What do you call a midget psychic who just escaped from prison?
A: A small medium at large.