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Sex Jokes
Distracted
Sorry if I seem distracted, but my neighbor was murdered in a horribly violent sex attack.
And I don't know what to do with the body.
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Shipwrecked Man
A man was shipwrecked with his dog and a sheep on a tiny island in the middle of nowhere. Everytime the man moved close to the sheep, his dog would snarl and growl at him.
One day while walking the island he discovered a lovely naked lady who also had just become marooned. "Finally, some company!" he thought. While sitting on the shore and the watching the sunset with his new female friend, he slowly leaned over and whispered in her ear, ''Hey, could you go walk the dog?''
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Speaking of Sex
A gentleman is permitted to join a private club. The initiation consists of holding an unprepared on-the-spot lecture, on a theme starting on a letter which is alotted to him. The man gets an S, and chooses to give his impromptu lecture on Sex. Coming home and reporting to his wife, he chickens out and says that he spoke about Sailing. The next day, his wife meets a club member who says her hubby "gave a very good lecture last night -haw haw haw." The wife recalled; "That's strange, I must say. He has only done it twice. The first time he got sick, and the second time he lost his hat."
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