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The best jokes and joke writers!

Couples Compliments

Three couples went to a resturant. The women wanted to compliment the men with something that was on the table.
"Could you pass me the sugar, sugar?" said the first gal.
"Could you pass me the honey, honey?" said the second.
"Could you pass me the bacon, pig?" said the third.

Love Graph

I'm making a graph of my past relationships...

I have an 'ex'-axis and a 'why?'-axis.

Chinese Date

I asked a chinese girl for her number. She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."

Lady Tattoo

My girlfriend has a seashell tattooed on her inner thigh.

If you put your ear to it, you can smell the ocean.

Attraction

I consider myself somewhat of a pussy magnet...

...but with my recent luck I think the polarity is wrong.