Jealousy

Mrs. Culpepper was almost in tears. "Oh Marie," she said to her maid, "I have reason to suspect that my husband is having an affair with his secretary." "I don't believe it for one minute!" Marie snapped. "You're just saying that to make me jealous!!!"

Girl Talk

Two women who are best friends are talking.
"Martha, if I slept with your husband, would we remain friends?"
"No."
"So, we'll be enemies then?
"No."
"What would we be then?
"Even."

The Drinking Buddy's Marriage Problems

I was out with one of my best drinking buddies, George, and he was talking about marriage and his wife. He drank some, then said, "Well, what it comes down to Jimmy, is... well... my wife knows nothing of my wants and needs... she's hardly ever in the mood for sex.  I guess what it comes down to is that my wife just doesn't understand me at all, does yours ?"  
I thought about it a minute or two, then said. "I don't think so George, as a matter of fact, I don't recall her ever even mentioning your name at all!"