Horse and Chicken
A horse and a chicken are playing in a meadow. The horse falls into a mud hole and is sinking. He calls to the chicken to go and get the farmer to help pull him out to safety. The chicken runs to the farm but the farmer can't be found. So he drives the farmer's Mercedes back to the mud hole and ties some rope around the bumper. He then throws the other end of the rope to his friend, the horse, and drives the car forward saving him from sinking! A few days later, the chicken and horse were playing in the meadow again and the chicken fell into the mud hole. The chicken yelled to the horse to go and get some help from the farmer. The horse said, "I think I can stand over the hole!" So he stretched over the width of the hole and said, "Grab for my 'thingy' and pull yourself up." And the chicken did and pulled himself to safety. The moral of the story: If you are hung like a horse, you don't need a Mercedes to pick up chicks.
Q: What did the horse say when he fell?
A: I've fallen and I can't giddy up!
Q: What animal always goes to bed with its shoes on?
A: A horse!
Q: What is a horse's favorite sport?
A: Stable tennis!
Q: What did the veterinarian say when a pony came in complaining about a sore throat?
A: I know what's wrong here; you're just a little hoarse!