Piss Your Girlfriend Off

Q: How do you piss your girlfriend off when your having sex?
A: Call her up

The Expat

The American in Hong Kong was talking to his wife one evening over supper. "Get this..." he chuckled, "That ridiculous janitor of ours claims he's made love to every woman in the building except one." "Hmmmmmmmmm," said his wife, assuming a thoughtful faraway type expression, "must be that stuck-up Mrs. Stewart on the eighth floor."

Unfaithful Mates

Otis, Henry, and Tom were sitting in a bar discussing their wives. Henry started by saying, "I think my wife is fooling around on me. I went home the other day and found a hammer and a saw under our bed. I think she is cheatin' on me with a carpenter!"
Tom answered, "Ya, I think my wife is not faithful either. The other day I went home and found a pipe wrench and some pipes under my bed. I think she is cheatin' on me with a plumber!"
Otis then joins in and says, "Well, if you think that's bad, I've got one for ya. I went home yesterday and found a cowboy under my bed. I think my Lina is cheatin' on me with a horse!"