Mexican Girl Gets Pregnant
Q: How did the Mexican girl get pregnant?
A: Her teacher told her to do an essay.
Two 5 year old black kids (boy and girl) went out trick or treating in a rich Texas suburb. The other kids said this Texas Oil Billionaire was giving out iPods. So they knocked on this guys door and said trick or treat. The guy said, "What are you dressed as?" The little girl said, "Jack 'n Jill." The guy said, "You cant be Jack 'n Jill, you're black." So the kids left and came back and the guy said, "And what are you guys supposed to be this time?" The little girl said, "Hansel 'n Gretel." The guy says, "You can't be Hansel 'n Gretel, you're black." So the kids leave upset only to come back a few minutes later. This time they were naked. The guys says, "And just what are you supposed to be now?" The little girl says, "M&M’s, I’m plain and he got nuts"
A zebra dies and goes to heaven. When checking in, he tells St. Peter, "Say, I have always wanted to know if I am white with black stripes or black with white stripes."
St. Peter, "I can't answer that question... but see God walking around over there? Ask him."
Zebra goes to God, "God, am I white with black stripes or black with white stripes?"
God looks at the zebra sagely and states, "You are what you are."
Frustrated, the zebra returns to St. Peter. "What did He say?" asks St. Peter.
"Oh," replies the zebra. "He just said, 'You are what you are,' and I still don't know whether I'm black with white stripes or white with black stripes."
"Oh, that's easy," says St. Peter. "You are white with black stripes."
"How do you know?" asks the zebra. "Well," says St. Peter, "if you were black with white stripes he would have said 'you is what you is.'"
Tall Black People
Q: Ever wonder how black people get so tall?
A: It's because their knee grows!
One day this guy goes in to the doctor's office to get his willy enlarged. The guy's sitting there on the table and the doctor comes in with a tray of willys. The guy says, ''You got any bigger ones?'' So the doctor comes in with another tray. But the guy still wants bigger, ''You got any bigger ones?'' So the doctor comes in with yet another tray. The guy finally says, ''I'll take one of those. But do you have any in white?''