Jokes about Kids

Four Kids

There were once four kids, Poop, Shut Up, Manners, and Trouble. Poop was riding his bike and fell. Manners went to help him up. Trouble got lost. Shut Up goes to the Police Station to report it.
Officer: What's your name?
Shut Up: Shut Up.
Officer: What's your name?
Shut Up: Shut Up.
Officer: For the last time, WHAT'S YOUR NAME?!
Shut Up: Shut Up!
Officer: Are you looking for Trouble?
Shut Up: Yeah, we lost him about 2 miles back.
Officer: Where's your Manners?
Shut Up: Back there pickin' up Poop.

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

A Fortunate Coincidence

John: "I'm glad you named me John."
Mother: "Why?"
John: "Because that's what all the kids at school call me."

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Billy's Father and His Mystery Occupation

A grade school teacher was asking students what their parents did for a living. "Tim, you be first," she said. "What does your mother do all day?"  Tim stood up and proudly said, "She's a doctor."  "That's wonderful.  How about you, Amie?" Amie shyly stood up, scuffed her feet and said, "My father is a mailman."  "Thank you, Amie," said the teacher.  "What about your father, Billy?"  Billy proudly stood up and announced, "My daddy murders people, steals from them, and drinks."  The teacher was aghast and promptly changed the subject to geography. Later that day, she went to Billy's house and rang the bell. Billy's father answered the door. The teacher explained what his son had said and asked if there might be some logical explanation.  Billy's father said, "I'm actually an attorney. But how can I explain a thing like that to a seven-year-old?"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous