Worst Final Comments

10. See me after class.
9. Did you even read the material?
8. It's a C, but it's a strong C.
7. Fascinatingly convoluted.
6. My, what nice, big margins!
5. You must've been up all last night.
4. The book ends differently than the movie.
3. Spelling requires more than just sounding it out.
2. Are you familiar with the term "plagiarism"?
1. Tell your mom to try harder.

Black Santa

When I was a kid, my father would tell me that the black Santa Claus was coming to our house for Christmas. Instead of putting out cookies and milk, we would put out cornbread and purple kool-aid.

Three Redneck Lies

1. The pickup is paid for.
2. I won this belt buckle in the rodeo.
3. I was just helping that sheep over the fence.