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The best jokes and joke writers!

Remarkable Mom

The most remarkable thing about our mother is that for 30 years she served our family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found.

Shared Decision Making

My wife and I have an agreement that works... She is responsible for the small decisions, and I am responsible for the big ones. This means that she decides things like where to take our next vacation, the color of our next car, and the construction budget for adding on the new family room. I decide whether or not the President should extend most favored nation trading status to China, how high the Federal Reserve should go with short term interest rates, and the timetable for the elimination of CFC's from automobile air conditioners.

New Medical Study

A new medical study has shown that a woman's breast-feeding isn't adversely affected by aerobics. It was found, however, to be pretty distracting to guys in the class.

No Children

Mother: What seems to be the problem with you? You have been married three years and still no children. I had hopes of being a grandmother by now.

Daughter: I just don't know, Mom! Billy tries all the time, it's just that I have a lot of trouble swallowing.

Freudian Slip

Woman walks into her psychiatrists office and says: "Hey doc, you know how we have been talking about Freudian slips? Well, I had the most amazing one last night. I was eating dinner with my mother, and I meant to say, "please pass the salt," but instead I said ,"You god damn bitch, you ruined my life."