We're sorry, but it appears that you are using an anonymous proxy. To prevent fraudulent voting, we don't allow votes from anonymous proxies.

This contest requires users to be registered in order to vote.

You must be a registered user to submit a joke.  But registering is FREE and don’t worry, we only need a name and e-mail address, and we don’t sell or share your information with any third-parties (see Privacy Policy).

You must complete account validation before submitting jokes. Click here to go to your profile page to complete the process.

We’re sorry, but your browser settings indicate that you don’t want to be tracked.  You can either disable that setting or simply register for a FREE account, so we’ll know that you want us to track your preferences and feedback.  Don’t worry, we only need a name and e-mail address and we don’t sell or share your information with any third-parties (see Privacy Policy).


The best jokes and joke writers!

Doing the Right Thing

"Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady."
"Well, you have done the right thing son."
"But mom, I was sitting on daddy's lap!"

Mistakes

I told my dad that he should embrace his mistakes

He had tears in his eyes. Then he hugged my sister and me.

Ain't She Cute

Father: (at hospital looking through glass at newly arrived babies) "Kitchy kitchy koo. Look, she smiled... isn't she cute?"

Friend: "But your kid didn't smile."

Father: "I was talking about the nurse."

Tree Watch

I don’t trust those trees, son.

Son: What?! Why not?

They seem kinda shady to me.

Dad Joke - Oldest

Dad: "You ask too many questions. Just like your older brother used to."

Me: "But... I'm the oldest."

Dad: "Now."